Hello Blogosphere!!
I've moved! Come see me at bithiahlee.wordpress.com
love,
bcl.
Friday, January 2, 2015
Saturday, November 29, 2014
The Detroit Comeback: Is it real?
"You lived in Detroit? Get out. No you didn't. You mean you lived in one of the nice suburbs around Detroit? No? So, actually like, inside Detroit Detroit. Wow, well, tell me about it. I read this article the other day... I mean, I've been hearing a lot about Detroit lately..."
So have I.
Over the last couple of years or so, "The Detroit Comeback" has become a staple headline across news media outlets all around the globe. From small local newspapers to the BBC, the headline has been recycled eagerly over and over again. And quite frankly, that headline is really starting to upset me.
Now, before any of you proud Detroiters start throwing your coney dogs at me, let me first say this: I love Detroit! I just have a bone to pick with Detroit's new trademark "The Detroit Comeback" headline.
First, this headline has created a shockingly polarized population. The headline talks about Detroit's Comeback as if it were a thing, an object. An issue you can agree with or disagree with, rather than as an action or a process. A person's reaction to the headline now indicates whether they are for Detroit, or against. It seems that you're either "I heart Detroit" or you're a "hater." You either run around waving your Detroit D flag around in everyone's faces, or you're seen as skeptical, pessimistic. A non-believer.
This polarization is unhealthy. It says that those who live in the city are not welcome to acknowledge the problems and imperfections of the city, an acknowledgement that must take place before any solutions can take form. Those who are ballsy enough to notice issues are shamed into leaving the city. The proud Detroiters boo them out of the city, screaming, "and take your negativity with you!" This will not help the city grow.
Another problem with this headline is that it attracts perhaps the wrong crowd to the city, or at least an unbalanced one. If Detroit advertises itself as the new, hip city to be in, she's going to attract people who are concerned about being hip. We need to attract more. We need to attract hard workers and smart, educated individuals. The current headline brings in people who want what Detroit has promised to give them, but we need people who want to give to Detroit.
Oh yes, there are terribly wonderful things happening in Detroit right now. Certain neighborhoods are indeed developing and growing. Midtown, Downtown, and Lafayette Park are becoming increasingly nicer and safer places to live. There are truly exciting new opportunities available throughout the city. Inventive new local businesses are opening up. The Riverfront is more beautiful, the Dequindre Cut, cleaner. These were some of the things I experienced when I first moved to Detroit. Why, then, two years later, did I, like so many others, find myself struggling with feelings of disappointment and disillusionment about our beloved city? Why did it feel like a let-down?
Again, I partially blame the headlines. I think that the buzz and the hype created by the headlines are not helping her cause. In fact, it may be hurting the effort. If, instead of "The Detroit Comeback," the headlines read "Detroit is Coming Back," emphasis on the -ing, the people who find themselves hurriedly migrating to Detroit might be better prepared for what their lives will look like for a long time to come, and what types of efforts and commitment are truly required if they are to indeed, become a part of this "comeback."
The comeback is real, but it's been packaged and marketed inaccurately. It's a small city that keeps boasting, screaming at everyone, "DEEEEEEEEETROIT. WE ARE HERE. WE ARE COMING BACK. COME AND WATCH US BOOM!!!" With these flashy headlines and grandiose promises, our small, broken city has managed to convince a new slew of energetic families and eager young adults to make the move. But, the reality is that many of us feel tricked by the headlines. So many have become disillusioned by the hefty promises. Popular buzzwords like innovative, creative, entrepreneurial, design-thinking, forward-looking, super hip, trendy, and spirited get thrown at us from every direction, covering up the truth that the city still doesn't offer recycling or public transportation. The "Detroit Hustles Harder" and "Haters Gon' Hate" t-shirts almost seem tired now, riddled with mockery. And finally, we begin to realize that pure defiance won't bring Detroit "back."
But that isn't a bad thing! It's just a realistic thing.
The truth is, I believe Detroit is coming back. But what most people don't understand before making the move to Detroit is that the city's "comeback" is not necessarily the kind of movement that you can feel. While living in Detroit for the past two years, I did not feel on a daily basis the ground shaking beneath me with growth and improvement. I was not trembling with excitement of fresh change every moment in the city. Now, whenever I see another "The Detroit Comeback" headline, I feel that it has about as much effect on me as if I were to see a headline that read "The World is Spinning." Yes, it's true that the earth is rotating on its axis, every single moment of every single day. Thanks to science, we all know that. But even though the earth is spinning at nearly 1,040 miles/hour(!!!), we don't feel it spinning beneath our feet. No one seems to be disappointed about that, though!
In the same way, I think that if Detroit stopped relying on hype to draw people to the city, people would stop relying on hype to keep them there. We don't feel the earth moving, but we know that it is, because with every passing 24 hours, we see daylight and then we see night. People need to watch and experience Detroit's comeback with that same type of patience and faith. I believe that Detroit is coming back, but it hasn't been happening overnight. And it won't necessarily happen in the next year, two years, or three years. This doesn't have to be seen in a negative light, though. As long as people stop expecting everything to be fixed overnight, they may find the endurance and hope they need to truly witness and contribute to the long-term growth of what promises to be a beautiful city again.
Detroit is coming back, but don't hold your breath. You'll burn out, give up, pack up and leave, disheartened and disappointed by the problems, poverty, dirtiness, and brokenness that still exist in Detroit today. Instead, come, settle down, and stay awhile. Detroit makes no promises to you. She still has a long way to go. There will still be things about the city that frustrate and annoy you. You may be discouraged at times by how slowly change is coming about. But, take heart! With steady steps, Detroit is moving forward. And one day, as surely as the earth is spinning today, we will celebrate when the headlines finally read, "Detroit Came Back."
To the D,
bcl.
So have I.
Over the last couple of years or so, "The Detroit Comeback" has become a staple headline across news media outlets all around the globe. From small local newspapers to the BBC, the headline has been recycled eagerly over and over again. And quite frankly, that headline is really starting to upset me.
Now, before any of you proud Detroiters start throwing your coney dogs at me, let me first say this: I love Detroit! I just have a bone to pick with Detroit's new trademark "The Detroit Comeback" headline.
First, this headline has created a shockingly polarized population. The headline talks about Detroit's Comeback as if it were a thing, an object. An issue you can agree with or disagree with, rather than as an action or a process. A person's reaction to the headline now indicates whether they are for Detroit, or against. It seems that you're either "I heart Detroit" or you're a "hater." You either run around waving your Detroit D flag around in everyone's faces, or you're seen as skeptical, pessimistic. A non-believer.
This polarization is unhealthy. It says that those who live in the city are not welcome to acknowledge the problems and imperfections of the city, an acknowledgement that must take place before any solutions can take form. Those who are ballsy enough to notice issues are shamed into leaving the city. The proud Detroiters boo them out of the city, screaming, "and take your negativity with you!" This will not help the city grow.
Another problem with this headline is that it attracts perhaps the wrong crowd to the city, or at least an unbalanced one. If Detroit advertises itself as the new, hip city to be in, she's going to attract people who are concerned about being hip. We need to attract more. We need to attract hard workers and smart, educated individuals. The current headline brings in people who want what Detroit has promised to give them, but we need people who want to give to Detroit.
Oh yes, there are terribly wonderful things happening in Detroit right now. Certain neighborhoods are indeed developing and growing. Midtown, Downtown, and Lafayette Park are becoming increasingly nicer and safer places to live. There are truly exciting new opportunities available throughout the city. Inventive new local businesses are opening up. The Riverfront is more beautiful, the Dequindre Cut, cleaner. These were some of the things I experienced when I first moved to Detroit. Why, then, two years later, did I, like so many others, find myself struggling with feelings of disappointment and disillusionment about our beloved city? Why did it feel like a let-down?
Again, I partially blame the headlines. I think that the buzz and the hype created by the headlines are not helping her cause. In fact, it may be hurting the effort. If, instead of "The Detroit Comeback," the headlines read "Detroit is Coming Back," emphasis on the -ing, the people who find themselves hurriedly migrating to Detroit might be better prepared for what their lives will look like for a long time to come, and what types of efforts and commitment are truly required if they are to indeed, become a part of this "comeback."
The comeback is real, but it's been packaged and marketed inaccurately. It's a small city that keeps boasting, screaming at everyone, "DEEEEEEEEETROIT. WE ARE HERE. WE ARE COMING BACK. COME AND WATCH US BOOM!!!" With these flashy headlines and grandiose promises, our small, broken city has managed to convince a new slew of energetic families and eager young adults to make the move. But, the reality is that many of us feel tricked by the headlines. So many have become disillusioned by the hefty promises. Popular buzzwords like innovative, creative, entrepreneurial, design-thinking, forward-looking, super hip, trendy, and spirited get thrown at us from every direction, covering up the truth that the city still doesn't offer recycling or public transportation. The "Detroit Hustles Harder" and "Haters Gon' Hate" t-shirts almost seem tired now, riddled with mockery. And finally, we begin to realize that pure defiance won't bring Detroit "back."
But that isn't a bad thing! It's just a realistic thing.
The truth is, I believe Detroit is coming back. But what most people don't understand before making the move to Detroit is that the city's "comeback" is not necessarily the kind of movement that you can feel. While living in Detroit for the past two years, I did not feel on a daily basis the ground shaking beneath me with growth and improvement. I was not trembling with excitement of fresh change every moment in the city. Now, whenever I see another "The Detroit Comeback" headline, I feel that it has about as much effect on me as if I were to see a headline that read "The World is Spinning." Yes, it's true that the earth is rotating on its axis, every single moment of every single day. Thanks to science, we all know that. But even though the earth is spinning at nearly 1,040 miles/hour(!!!), we don't feel it spinning beneath our feet. No one seems to be disappointed about that, though!
In the same way, I think that if Detroit stopped relying on hype to draw people to the city, people would stop relying on hype to keep them there. We don't feel the earth moving, but we know that it is, because with every passing 24 hours, we see daylight and then we see night. People need to watch and experience Detroit's comeback with that same type of patience and faith. I believe that Detroit is coming back, but it hasn't been happening overnight. And it won't necessarily happen in the next year, two years, or three years. This doesn't have to be seen in a negative light, though. As long as people stop expecting everything to be fixed overnight, they may find the endurance and hope they need to truly witness and contribute to the long-term growth of what promises to be a beautiful city again.
Detroit is coming back, but don't hold your breath. You'll burn out, give up, pack up and leave, disheartened and disappointed by the problems, poverty, dirtiness, and brokenness that still exist in Detroit today. Instead, come, settle down, and stay awhile. Detroit makes no promises to you. She still has a long way to go. There will still be things about the city that frustrate and annoy you. You may be discouraged at times by how slowly change is coming about. But, take heart! With steady steps, Detroit is moving forward. And one day, as surely as the earth is spinning today, we will celebrate when the headlines finally read, "Detroit Came Back."
To the D,
bcl.
Wednesday, November 26, 2014
I wish I were a terrible writer
Dear Blogosphere,
Today, I wish I were a terrible writer.
If I were a terrible writer, I would never want to write.
If I were a terrible writer, I would never want to write for even just a meager living.
If I were a terrible writer, I would never want to write for even just a meager living only to find cause to consider responding to a "job offer" with the following:
Today, I wish I were a terrible writer.
If I were a terrible writer, I would never want to write.
If I were a terrible writer, I would never want to write for even just a meager living.
If I were a terrible writer, I would never want to write for even just a meager living only to find cause to consider responding to a "job offer" with the following:
Dear Every Editor Who Has Ever Asked Me To Work For Free, by Stephanie Rice
I owe you an apology.
Somehow I have given you the impression that I value my work at approximately zero dollars.
It must have been something I said. Maybe when I mentioned my seven years of professional experience, you heard me say that I was so desperate for “exposure” that I valued it over a currency that would pay my rent.
The most recent version of you emailed just this past weekend that you were interested in using a 2,500-word essay I had submitted. No, you could not afford to pay but not to worry—there were “perks” to replace that boring old cash that’s really only good for eating food and paying student loans. One of them, you said, was “editor friends.”
Friends. You literally offered to be my friend if I would hand you my work for nothing. Doesn’t this feel a little like we’re in middle school, and you’re offering me a place at the cool kids’ lunch table if I’ll write your book report?
Friends. You literally offered to be my friend if I would hand you my work for nothing. Doesn’t this feel a little like we’re in middle school, and you’re offering me a place at the cool kids’ lunch table if I’ll write your book report?
I don’t mean to be harsh. I know you mean well. I know you’re probably a perfectly nice human who doesn’t make the rules of the organization for which you work and has no idea how offensive it is to suggest that I give you my words for free. The words that begin rolling through my mind in the morning as the caffeine seeps into my brain. The words that sometimes make me forget to eat lunch as I furiously type. The words that I try to recapture from my scrawled notes and my dreams.
It’s not your fault that somehow we have gotten to a place where it’s socially acceptable to expect me to work for exactly nothing. It’s not your fault that others before me have probably taken you up on this offer of friendship payment, cementing in your mind that not only is it OK but maybe even helpful. You’re getting people published, getting them that valuable “exposure” that will definitely lead to the New York Times calling sometime next week.
And to be fair, you did also promise the chance to be part of an “awesome mission” and to occasionally receive “free stuff.” I didn’t ask about the free stuff, but I don’t think it includes the groceries I didn’t buy with the money you didn’t pay me.
One of my closest friends is a dentist. I bet you wouldn’t ask her to do a tooth extraction for free. If you hired a chef for a dinner party, would you tell that person that unfortunately the chef budget is a little thin right now—but this gig will be really great exposure and totally worth it anyway?
Sometimes I think it would be convenient if I didn’t have to pay the lady who cleans the apartments in my building. But I admit I feel a bit awkward about asking if she might accept my gratitude instead. Or maybe my saying some nice things about her to the building owner once in a while? Oh, I think I’ll just keep giving her cash. She probably likes feeding her kids.
We can probably all agree that it wouldn’t be fair to expect that our dentist or cleaning lady or personal trainer or pizza delivery guy work for free. So what is it exactly about writers and photographers and freelancers of any stripe really? Are we all walking around with a “tell me I am worth nothing” sign slapped to our collective back?
Would you even have been willing to send the “we can’t afford to pay at this time” email if you weren’t getting paid for the minutes you spent typing?
And let me be clear: I’m not even 100 percent against working for free. I’m probably 98.7 percent against it. But I do think that there are times when it can be a reasonable thing to do.
In college, I wrote two unpaid stories for a neighborhood paper with ties to the journalism department. Also in college, I worked for practically nothing for an investigative reporter who taught me how to dig into public records and build a network of sources. I learned more from him than I had in any college class and would do it again despite the fact that my $150/byline contract probably worked out to cents per hour.
So yes, I understand that when you’re just starting out, sometimes it makes sense to take a little “exposure” or “mentoring” in place of cash. When you’re at that point in your career, there is some value in those things.
But here’s the problem: We’ve come to a point where even those of us who have been doing this longer than a semester are also expected to be grateful just to see our words in print.
I don’t have any answers—I would have put them up top if I did—but I know we’ve got to find a way to change this. Because you want to be my friend, and I just want to be paid for my work.
All the best, Stephanie
P.S. Full disclosure: I was paid $100 to write you this letter.
Sunday, November 2, 2014
This day
Dear Today,
Leave house.
Approach car.
Discover driver's seat door is locked and jammed.
Unlock trunk manually.
Climb in through trunk to unlock passenger door.
Climb out of trunk.
Climb into passenger seat to crawl into driver's seat.
Discover driver's door is still locked and jammed. Cannot open from inside.
Attempt to start car to no avail.
Crawl back out through passenger door.
Slam passenger door behind me.
Passenger door bounces back out.
Passenger lock stuck. Cannot close.
Go home.
Reheat leftovers in microwave.
Microwave stops 15 seconds in.
Microwave error message: This machine is no longer functioning properly. It can no longer be used. Please call Jen Hall ###-#### for assistance.
Eff you, futuristic appliances.
Attempt to adjust time on watch.
Watch dial is missing. Has fallen off. Nowhere to be found.
Fully potty-trained puppy jumps onto couch and pees out 20 seconds worth of pee.
Skype with dad.
Call dropped.
Skype with dad.
Call dropped.
Skype with dad.
Call dropped.
Skype with dad.
Call dropped.
Skype with dad.
Call dropped.
Skype with dad.
Call dropped.
Skype with dad.
Call dropped.
Decide to call it a night.
Reach for phone to set alarm.
Alarm clock widget suddenly broken.
Respond with frustration and ?!?!!
Until I realized that it was still today.
Then it made sense.
I bite my thumb at you, Today. You were so weird.
- bcl.
I am writing down everything that you did to me today so that one day, I can look back on you and either laugh or cry.
Leave house.
Approach car.
Discover driver's seat door is locked and jammed.
Unlock trunk manually.
Climb in through trunk to unlock passenger door.
Climb out of trunk.
Climb into passenger seat to crawl into driver's seat.
Discover driver's door is still locked and jammed. Cannot open from inside.
Attempt to start car to no avail.
Crawl back out through passenger door.
Slam passenger door behind me.
Passenger door bounces back out.
Passenger lock stuck. Cannot close.
Go home.
Reheat leftovers in microwave.
Microwave stops 15 seconds in.
Microwave error message: This machine is no longer functioning properly. It can no longer be used. Please call Jen Hall ###-#### for assistance.
Eff you, futuristic appliances.
Attempt to adjust time on watch.
Watch dial is missing. Has fallen off. Nowhere to be found.
Fully potty-trained puppy jumps onto couch and pees out 20 seconds worth of pee.
Skype with dad.
Call dropped.
Skype with dad.
Call dropped.
Skype with dad.
Call dropped.
Skype with dad.
Call dropped.
Skype with dad.
Call dropped.
Skype with dad.
Call dropped.
Skype with dad.
Call dropped.
Decide to call it a night.
Reach for phone to set alarm.
Alarm clock widget suddenly broken.
Respond with frustration and ?!?!!
Until I realized that it was still today.
Then it made sense.
I bite my thumb at you, Today. You were so weird.
- bcl.
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
The mug warmer
I don't really understand how it is decided what is cool. Like, piercing your ears and getting fringe bangs is cool, but wearing a fanny pack and using a mug warmer is not.
Recently, as I was packing to move, I was digging around the kitchen looking for cool mugs and tumblers to take with me when I suddenly came across a mug warmer. I kind of scoffed at it, put it back in its drawer, and then continued rummaging. But then I thought about it some more. These two things I know to be true about me: 1) I am almost obsessed with hot beverages, and 2) I am one of the slowest drinkers of all my social circles combined. Which sucks, because I never get to finish a hot beverage. I usually get the steamy mug placed into my hands, happy as a bee, and that first sip is like THIS IS THE BEST every single time. But three sips in, and I'm like ice inside. You know what might fix this tragedy? Oh. Yes. An effing mug warmer.
I sneakily put the mug warmer into my boxes.
This morning, I was sitting at my table, enjoying my breakfast of ginger snap cookies and coffee when I decided to try my mug warmer. It changed everything.
But it also got me thinking about why mug warmers weren't more "in"/trendy/hip/awesome. I mean, man, if everyone who drinks hot drinks bought one of these $3 hot plates, everyone would always have hot hot drinks.
Alas, dear blogosphere, I have come to the conclusion that the culprit this time is again, our people's preoccupation with appearances.
Let's take the aforementioned examples: ear piercings = cool. Fanny packs = uncool. Fringe bangs = cool. Mug warmers = uncool. You know that. I know that. Everybody knows that. But like, why?
Currently, I have 3 piercings between my 2 ears (oh yes, asymmetry is suuuuuper hip) and I used to have fringe bangs. I feel very cool about that, but I also know that the very awesome ability to wear earrings just means that I paid someone a lot of money to pierce my flesh with a needle and then I spent some painful months twisting the metal around the newly formed bloody hole so that I could make the totally unnatural hole stay open permanently. WHAT. And fringe bangs! Well, let me just say this. They look good for like 30 seconds (which is shorter than the length of time my hot drinks stay hot without a mug warmer). You have to trim them all the time, and comb them, and if you ever step outside on a windy day -- or just move your head at all -- they will be blown away and they will look crazy. If you cut them like a centimeter too short, you look a fool, and when they're grown out a centimeter, you've got millions of tiny hairs just stabbing you in the eyes all day. Disgusting. (Unless you buy these, omg: Fashion Girls New Clip-On Front Neat Bang Fringe Hair Extensions)
On the other hand, fanny packs. They're light, they conveniently free up your hands, and they are harder to rob than backpacks and purses. And mug warmers? See above.
So haha. I will probably continue to like my earrings and think fringe bangs are great. I just also feel like it is a funny thing that I do. Let me end this post with a short list of more cool and uncool things that you should really think about.
WHY are these things cool?
drawing in your eyebrows
pistachios
camelbak water bottles (seriously, that straw that you can never ever wash...)
rain kissing
Why don't people like these more?
wearing knee + elbow pads while roller blading
roller blading
dino nuggets
scrunchies
Except for hipsters.
Stay cool,
bcl.
Recently, as I was packing to move, I was digging around the kitchen looking for cool mugs and tumblers to take with me when I suddenly came across a mug warmer. I kind of scoffed at it, put it back in its drawer, and then continued rummaging. But then I thought about it some more. These two things I know to be true about me: 1) I am almost obsessed with hot beverages, and 2) I am one of the slowest drinkers of all my social circles combined. Which sucks, because I never get to finish a hot beverage. I usually get the steamy mug placed into my hands, happy as a bee, and that first sip is like THIS IS THE BEST every single time. But three sips in, and I'm like ice inside. You know what might fix this tragedy? Oh. Yes. An effing mug warmer.
I sneakily put the mug warmer into my boxes.
This morning, I was sitting at my table, enjoying my breakfast of ginger snap cookies and coffee when I decided to try my mug warmer. It changed everything.
But it also got me thinking about why mug warmers weren't more "in"/trendy/hip/awesome. I mean, man, if everyone who drinks hot drinks bought one of these $3 hot plates, everyone would always have hot hot drinks.
Alas, dear blogosphere, I have come to the conclusion that the culprit this time is again, our people's preoccupation with appearances.
Let's take the aforementioned examples: ear piercings = cool. Fanny packs = uncool. Fringe bangs = cool. Mug warmers = uncool. You know that. I know that. Everybody knows that. But like, why?
Currently, I have 3 piercings between my 2 ears (oh yes, asymmetry is suuuuuper hip) and I used to have fringe bangs. I feel very cool about that, but I also know that the very awesome ability to wear earrings just means that I paid someone a lot of money to pierce my flesh with a needle and then I spent some painful months twisting the metal around the newly formed bloody hole so that I could make the totally unnatural hole stay open permanently. WHAT. And fringe bangs! Well, let me just say this. They look good for like 30 seconds (which is shorter than the length of time my hot drinks stay hot without a mug warmer). You have to trim them all the time, and comb them, and if you ever step outside on a windy day -- or just move your head at all -- they will be blown away and they will look crazy. If you cut them like a centimeter too short, you look a fool, and when they're grown out a centimeter, you've got millions of tiny hairs just stabbing you in the eyes all day. Disgusting. (Unless you buy these, omg: Fashion Girls New Clip-On Front Neat Bang Fringe Hair Extensions)
On the other hand, fanny packs. They're light, they conveniently free up your hands, and they are harder to rob than backpacks and purses. And mug warmers? See above.
So haha. I will probably continue to like my earrings and think fringe bangs are great. I just also feel like it is a funny thing that I do. Let me end this post with a short list of more cool and uncool things that you should really think about.
WHY are these things cool?
drawing in your eyebrows
pistachios
camelbak water bottles (seriously, that straw that you can never ever wash...)
rain kissing
Why don't people like these more?
wearing knee + elbow pads while roller blading
roller blading
dino nuggets
scrunchies
Except for hipsters.
Stay cool,
bcl.
Thursday, September 11, 2014
Beginner
When it comes to using the web, I am sad to report, that I am at a mere beginner's level.
At this very moment, I own the following:
bithiahlee.blogspot.com
bithiahlee.wordpress.com
bithiahlee.com
And I don't know how to use any of them! To be frank, I don't even know why I have all of them. But people kept telling me that I should hurry up and get them all before it's too late (for what?), and then I panicked and now I just feel a little bit like a greedy fool.
All my pictures are blurry, the margins don't fit, and I don't know how to change any of the colors.
Hahaha. Wish me luck, everyone, as I attempt to make all my blogs amazing.
- bcl.
At this very moment, I own the following:
bithiahlee.blogspot.com
bithiahlee.wordpress.com
bithiahlee.com
And I don't know how to use any of them! To be frank, I don't even know why I have all of them. But people kept telling me that I should hurry up and get them all before it's too late (for what?), and then I panicked and now I just feel a little bit like a greedy fool.
All my pictures are blurry, the margins don't fit, and I don't know how to change any of the colors.
Hahaha. Wish me luck, everyone, as I attempt to make all my blogs amazing.
- bcl.
Wednesday, September 10, 2014
The Chronicles of "Bithiah" (Part 2)
Dear Blogosphere,
About a year ago, I wrote this blog post titled The Chronicles of "Bithiah" (Part 1), and it was obviously a huge hit. At the time, I titled it Part 1 because I thought that I had enough stories to write a Part 2. While that is certainly true, I think that today's time will be much better spent discussing the root cause of many of my gender-confused, name-related chronicles instead.
All my life, I have had to live with a name that isn't feminine. Whenever someone meets me in person and hears my name, they always respond with something along the lines of, "Oh, wow. What a beautiful name! It's so pretty and unique." But for those who read my name before seeing me in person, they are usually left scratching their heads, wondering all sorts of things about this "Bithiah". And sometimes, they think I'm a boy.
I used to think that it was because when my name is pronounced correctly, the words "big" and "thigh" can be heard. And let's face it, thighs are boyish things. And big thighs are manly things.
But then, in recent times, I have had to reconsider this supposition of mine. That's because I realized that when people read my name before they hear me say it, they're just guessing at its pronunciation... and they always guess wrong. So, when they're saying "Bith-thee-ah" in their heads, the "big" and "thigh" are totally lost. What then, I asked myself, is the cause of the consistent guessing that I'm O--> ?
The root cause, I have discovered, is this theory that I have named "The Feminine A and Masculine Consonants Theory". I think the title is sufficiently self-explanatory, but let me break it down into two parts for you anyway. The theory supposes that names ending in the letter A appear feminine, and names ending in consonants appear more masculine.
To demonstrate the first half of the theory, I shall conduct this brief experiment.
Classic Boy Names:
Michael
Alex
Daniel
Samuel
Bithiah
When you add an A to the end, they become:
Michaela
Alexa
Daniela
Samuela
Bithia
And to demonstrate the second half of the theory, see...
Classic Boy Names:
Daniel
Aidan
Brian
Jon
Bithiah
When you drop the consonant at the end, they become:
Danie
Aida
Bria
Jo
Bithia
Don't they look girly?
Welp. Thanks for coming here to learn today! I look forward to the day when children will be reading about the "The Feminine A and Masculine Consonants Theory" in textbooks in schools all around the world.
- bcl.
About a year ago, I wrote this blog post titled The Chronicles of "Bithiah" (Part 1), and it was obviously a huge hit. At the time, I titled it Part 1 because I thought that I had enough stories to write a Part 2. While that is certainly true, I think that today's time will be much better spent discussing the root cause of many of my gender-confused, name-related chronicles instead.
All my life, I have had to live with a name that isn't feminine. Whenever someone meets me in person and hears my name, they always respond with something along the lines of, "Oh, wow. What a beautiful name! It's so pretty and unique." But for those who read my name before seeing me in person, they are usually left scratching their heads, wondering all sorts of things about this "Bithiah". And sometimes, they think I'm a boy.
I used to think that it was because when my name is pronounced correctly, the words "big" and "thigh" can be heard. And let's face it, thighs are boyish things. And big thighs are manly things.
But then, in recent times, I have had to reconsider this supposition of mine. That's because I realized that when people read my name before they hear me say it, they're just guessing at its pronunciation... and they always guess wrong. So, when they're saying "Bith-thee-ah" in their heads, the "big" and "thigh" are totally lost. What then, I asked myself, is the cause of the consistent guessing that I'm O--> ?
The root cause, I have discovered, is this theory that I have named "The Feminine A and Masculine Consonants Theory". I think the title is sufficiently self-explanatory, but let me break it down into two parts for you anyway. The theory supposes that names ending in the letter A appear feminine, and names ending in consonants appear more masculine.
To demonstrate the first half of the theory, I shall conduct this brief experiment.
Classic Boy Names:
Michael
Alex
Daniel
Samuel
Bithiah
When you add an A to the end, they become:
Michaela
Alexa
Daniela
Samuela
Bithia
And to demonstrate the second half of the theory, see...
Classic Boy Names:
Daniel
Aidan
Brian
Jon
Bithiah
When you drop the consonant at the end, they become:
Danie
Aida
Bria
Jo
Bithia
Don't they look girly?
Welp. Thanks for coming here to learn today! I look forward to the day when children will be reading about the "The Feminine A and Masculine Consonants Theory" in textbooks in schools all around the world.
- bcl.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)